Title: Believe in me...
Author: DanaK35; DanaK35@yahoo.com 
URL: http://danak35.tripod.com/
Archiving: sure, let me know where though
Rating: PG
Classification: MSR, Vignette
Spoilers: at this point? The movie?
Keywords: Mulder POV, hallway scene in FTF
Summary: Thought racing through a man's head

Disclaimer: 'The X-Files' and all 'The X-Files' related
characters and situations are the intellectual property
of Chris Carter, 1013 Productions and the FOX
network. The following material is not intended to 
infringe on the above copyright in any way. Which 
means, they aren't mine, yak yak yak...you know the drill!



Believe in me
by DanaK35

You enter my living room and I can see right away, 
that something is wrong.

Your eyes have lost their gleam, your mouth is a thin 
line and your whole posture states defeat.

My heart is beating madly in my chest as I anticipate 
the words before they even leave your mouth.

"Salt Lake City, Utah. Transfer effective immediately. 
I already gave Skinner my letter of resignation." You 
say, your voice a mere echo.

Inside I am screaming. 'NOOO, DON'T LEAVE ME', 
while I answer quietly " You can't quit now Scully."

And as you carefully formulate your speech and I am 
trying to make you see my point, just below my skin I 
am screaming.

Unbidden feelings assault my brain and my heart at 
once and all I want to do is take you in my arms, hold 
you and tell you everything I have held back for so 
long.

'Scully, even if you go, a part of you is always going 
to stay with me. We've been so close to the truth, 
we've come so far together, we were all we've had 
and more, don't leave! but I need you, I can't breathe 
without you! Believe in me! Believe in us!'

My own screaming voice echoes in my head but I on 
the outside I remain silent as you turn on your heels 
and leave my apartment.

Out loud I can only give you another platitude, 
another vain attempt to convince you of my cause. Of 
our cause.

Only when your clear words: "Why did they assign 
me to you in the first place Mulder? To debunk your 
work? To reign you in, to shut you down," reach my 
tortured brain can I find the strength to tell you what I 
really wanted to tell you all along.

"But you saved me. As difficult and as frustrating as 
it's been sometimes, your goddamn strict rationalism 
and science have saved me a thousand times over. 
You've kept me honest. You made me a a whole 
person. I owe you everything Scully, and you owe me 
nothing. I don't know if I want to do this alone...I don't 
even know if I can. And if I quit now, they win."

And finally when you look up and smile at me, tears 
glittering in your beautiful eyes the voice inside my 
head stops screaming.

I take your face in my hands and pull you close…


End.


Author's notes: 
A small attempt at Mulder's feelings… 
we all know how that scene ended!